Feb
old clothes that don't fit anymore, pictures she has drawn (i mean just odd bit of paper not photos she has put effort into more like doodles). For example I have had a sort out in my loft and was going to give her old clothes from when she was 2-3years and older to charity. There is nothing I was giving away that she had worn for a special occasion just normal everyday clothes. She cannot bear the thought of them going and is getting herself into a terrible say about it. I have asked her why and she doesn't know, she says she just feels she can't let them go. As I say she is enjoy it with everything, she has even gone through the recycling bin when she thought a drawing had been put in there. Don't get me wrong I don't try to get rid of things she still uses or anything that means a lot. I keep all her tiny note saying she cares about us etc and things like that but we haven't got room for keeping everything especially clothes that’ll never fit her again. I have told her I’ll not get rid of them until we have talked it over and sorted it out as she’s having sleepless nights about it. I’m thinking of talking to the doctor about it. Any ideas? or am I just looking for a problem that isn't there? Thanks
Answer:
Hi,
It could be a form of OCD as hoarding is one of the symptoms - even thought it's a less common one so perhaps looking into this might help.
however, it is just as likely to be that perhaps she feels by throwing out the things she had as a child that she’s being forced to grow up in some way. She could be feeling upset that you’re now seeing her as an older child and she is worrying that it symbolises not being your tiny girl anymore…it is a possibility. Some kids take the thought of growing up very difficult to cope with.
Keep speaking to her about it to see if she will be able to identify the problem herself, perhaps make recommendations and see if she agrees or not..like ” are you afraid that I won't love you as much if I give away your items, is that what’s upsetting you?” She is 9, young but soon to be in secondary school too and perhaps you could say that you’re worried about upsetting her but you are also worried why it is upsetting her so much and that you want her to work with you to help you both figure it out.
all the best
x
Answer:
Maybe because she’s afraid of growing up.
I know it is a long shot but bare with me.
If you had problems with, jobs, or you are having “grown up problems”
that perhaps injured you. Or (not to get personal) relationship problems that you’ve.
Maybe she is afraid of that.
It is probally like this, she knows that adults have a hard time and have a lot less freedom.
Maybe those so called doodles meant something to her that she wants to keep forever.
These are memories to her. It is just like you keep memories of her.
I hope you understand.
Answer:
I seen another child like this once she was devastated over her mother so readily giving up what she felt was her childhood although she was 8-9~she stated many things & was weeping~she was feeling by her mom giving up these “pretty things” that she was also giving up a part of her to strangers like the Mom did not care & was giving her out to strangers~you've received lots of good advise~you might need to take her for some counseling♦
Answer:
You should probably see a doctor or therapist over it, it seems she has a serious issue with it and most likely it's not going to be something with you can't help her with by yourself.
Also a therapist may be able to identify the root of the problem, and thus they have the ability to ideal form a plan to help her overcome this hoarding issue she has.
I wish you good luck with your daughter, hopefully you’ll be able to find help for her.
Answer:
If she’s only nine and they are up in the loft why not just give them away without telling her? It might seem a little harsh but if she didn't look at them in the first place why would she notice if they were gone? Maybe you are being too sensitive about the process - maybe you actually don't want to get rid of them either?
You could always try explaining to her that the old clothes will go to other kids who need them, but it sounds like your daughter has an obsession that she might need to see a physician about. Sleepless nights over old clothes and little drawings isn’t normal behaviour. Make an appointment with your GP.
Answer:
It's hoarding. You should get this fixed soon because it will get out of control, you can't keep enabling her by keeping everything like this, or even having her so involved with clearing out your house. Although it is distressing (and it IS distressing)
She might not go for it but I would recommend things like scanning her photos and saving them in computer files so you can make room.. so you’ll be keeping it but just in a smaller version 
and if she has clothes take a pic of them and save that too, and keep squares of the fabric that you can sew into something like a blanket.
It depends how bad she is but she should be okay with that. If it were me personally, i'd just go ahead and do it anyway. Hoarders basically never change and if you don't force them to then they'll just fill their life up with junk, some people even get to the stage where they start storing bodily fluids.
It is caused by anxiety and i'm guessing for it to begin so young that something triggered it so yeah you are ideal to get her talking to a therapist. I’m not sure the physician would help, I would just go straight to a therapist.
For someone who hoards it doesn't matter whether there’s sentimental value or not, it's just like you stated, they can't get rid of anything, even things that are rubbish. They usually don't want to forget the items/ aka memories, or think the things will be important or will come in useful in future or something like that. So they just want to keep it all.
But a lot of the time there is no apparent reason
edit: Oh and I just wanted to say that you’re being very sensible and caring about this, and at first glance it seems odd that you'd almost 'ask' her about giving her clothes away when your job is a parent is to just do whatever you want and it is too bad if the child protests. But I’m guessing you were trying to instruct her how to be a good person and contribute to a good cause, and tried to use the charity thing to help your child be a superior person and also it's common sense that she if she is reluctant to give them up then she might be more willing to if she knew it was going to help other children.
But it doesn't work that way with OCD. So even though you did everything right it kind of backfired due to her nature. So now the only thing left to do is be really strict and harsh.
And I’m not going to lie to you it will upset her a lot, that's why I think you should definitely go with the therapy.