Apr
My girlfriend and i have now tried to have sex on 2 separate occassions about 2 weeks apart!
She is, im proud to say, still a virgin and now she states she’s ready & im the one she wants to lose her virginity to. however during our attempts i have been unable to penetrate or at least not past the head of my penis. to my knowledge i am of average length and girth so this isnt the problem. and she is always suitably stimulated/wet.
The problem is it causes her unbearable pain. obviously im not going keep pushing on the subject and we will leave it for a while. But is there anything we could/should do between now and then? and anything we could do during to try to help the situation?
It isnt an issue to me but she is becoming, understandably, frustrated and upset with herself and her body 
.
Please help!
Answer:
I had this problem not so long ago with my bf. It took us 4/5 attempts before we succeeded and sure it injured but no pain no gain! Also we used ALOT of lube which really helped things along as well. You need to tell her as well that her worrying about it is going to make her even more tense,even without realising. Its meant to be a pleasureable experience for you both so make sure she knows that if it doesnt work out this time it doesnt matter! Practice makes perfect. Spend lots of time of foreplay and cuddle and kiss her. Like i said its gunna hurt but once its done, its done and you'll both be wondering what you were worried about all along! Ideal off luck, you'll get there! xx
Answer:
I would state that she should go and see her physician, even though I dont think she would want to as it would be quite embarassing for her.
A lot of things could be causing this pain, if she is nervous which she probably would be could cause this, if you say you’re average then I cant see a problem there and from everything else you say I doubt either of you actually has anything wrong with you that could cause it.
I would state try something like a lubricant as you didnt mention trying it, you never know it might solve your problem!
Answer:
A woman needs much more than to be 'willing' to lose her virginity, and she's 'frustrated' now, which makes it WORSE. Tell her that she needs to be 'totally turned on' … she needs to be 'wet' down there enough for your penis to 'fit inside' totally. I suggest that you learn how to use the OTHER parts of your body to give her pleasure intense enough to make YOUR 'penetration' something she wants not just mentally but physically. But you are getting this 'unbearable pain' because she's not 'turned on' enough when you try.
Answer:
She needs to be seen by a gynocologist. It could be she has a closed hymen, which surgery is her only option to open it.
it could also be that she is really tense- this will clamp shut the opening to the vagina and cause sex to be very painful.
both circumstances have medical names.
you can read more by going to:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hymen
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaginismus
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dyspareunia
good luck and wear a condom!
Answer:
Im assuming this is a hymen issue. Many girls lose their hymens naturally as they grow up, some dont. Also in certain cases the hymen can be abnormally thick.
In either case, she needs to see a Gynecologist. She has the ability to easily see if there’s a problem, and may also surgically remove the hymen (in office procedure usually)
Answer:
She is suitably stimulated? What sort of lovemaking is that? Best not to push on the subject either, poor girl. Her welfare should be an issue to you because you, without feeling it, are making her upset that she isn't fulfilling that side of whatever relationship you have. Make her feel safe in your arms and stop measuring. You'll be taking her vaginal temperature next.
Answer:
If she truly is ready and not suffering from a nervous tightening, she may need to see a gynecologist. There might be a problem with her development in that area. It's not entirely uncommon to have to be surgically altered to permit penetration. You are right not to force yourself into that area.
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What an understanding chap you’re :>) Why not try a suitable lubricant on yourself? When we've had a problem we've used KY, it's very good. Obtainable at most chemists, over the counter. Of course you don't say how old you are but I hope you are sensible enough to use a condom. These are already lubricated so don't need anything extra as it can rot them and make them tear.
Answer:
I remember when I lost mine. It hurt but it wasn't as painful as she’s saying it is. Could it be that she's really really nervous and there for isn't relaxed. I mean if she's expecting pain she may be clenching or something that could be making it worse. But, if she really feels like it is truly that painful, in all actuality it's not suppose to be. She should really speak to a doctor. They will be able to speak to her, confidentially.
Answer:
can i just state you are a very understandable boyfriend and she’s lucky to have you.
she might want to have sex and thinks she is aroused enough but it sounds to me like she’s still nervous. i'm afraid nothing will work until she relaxes. just try to do a bit of hugging kissing and forplay on a few ocasions. and one time when you’re both relaxed and rady try again.
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Since she's still a virgin try something small like a finger. Start out with one finger and when she’s comfortable with 1 then try 2 and so on until you stretch it a little. Even though she’s wet try some lub anyway to help ease things along.
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maybe you could finger her first so she gets used to it and then try again
good luck
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She should go see a doctor….everyone is made differently down there.
good luck
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Make sure you're going for the top hole! Good luck
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If there’s any doubt in her mind then it will seem a very big deal and she’ll unintentionally try to cease you.
I’ve just lost my viginity and found it good, but then I had experimented first with toys.
Start by fingering etc to show her the type of feeling she’ll experience and take it slow. The more she becomes comfortable with the idea the more she’ll rest and open up. I guess the word here’s foreplay, foreplay and more foreplay. Although she might be wet she might still be uncomfortable. Being wet isn’t always a sign that a woman is ready.
Make sure there are no distractions at the time, i.e your not trying to do it while in the back of a car where you could get caught, it will make her more nervous. Leave that for when your getting bored. LOL
I don't know your age or situatn but I hope your taking precautions and are of legal age, but thats a different issue. LOL
Good luck!
Answer:
Thinking about this, there are 2 possible reasons for the problem.
1) That although the mind is willing, the female is tensed up, and therefore not relaxed down below, which means that the act of penetration cannot take place easily as its like trying to push the penis through a tight hole in a brick wall, not very pleasant for either.
Remedy; go and have a good night out, let the young lady in question get tipsy as this tends to loosen the inhibitions, and relaxes a person, which should make the penetration easier.
No matter how much the lady wants to have intercourse, it is at times, a case of the mind is willing, but the possible stress through worry of it hurting etc, causes tension and tightening up down below usually involuntary.
2) That there’s a medical problem down below, which only a physician or gynaecologist can sort out. This may well be worth checking out if trying the remedy to part 1 has not worked.
Good luck to you both,
Mike t
Answer:
There might be a chance that she has two wombs. Check it out on the web. I once read a magazine article about a woman who suffered from attempts at sex before she realised that she had two wombs, meaning two cervical passages and that leads to impossible sex.
However, she underwent surgery and managed to have children. Take her to the doctors and have her x-rayed, if necessary.